listen

Miss Communication: Listening

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man-couple-people-woman.jpgToday’s political climate is…volatile (to put it nicely). It seems to me that everyone is yelling at the top of their lungs to be heard, but no one is listening.

 

 

Don’t get me wrong, I love a good debate and thoughtful discussion. Unfortunately, there doesn’t seem to be a lot of discussion taking place. I respect everyone’s right to have an opinion, and to share that opinion. But there is no hope of an actual discussion or change taking place if everyone is talking and no one is listening.

So, to resurrect something I used to do here often, a little Miss Communication advice – LISTEN.

Be quiet and listen. Listen to the birds singing, the wind blowing, the kid

s laughing, and to the thoughts of those whose opinions are geometrically opposed to yours. Don’t just hear the words they’re saying so you can tell them why they’re wrong. Listen to what they’re saying, think about it. Chances are you’re still going to hate every word, but you have no hope of changing someone else’s mind if you can’t counter their argument and formulate one of your own that they might listen to.

Communication is as much about what you want people to hear as it is what you have to say. Listen to what people are saying, then you’ll have a pretty good idea of what you really need to say.

Miss Communication – It’s not what you said, it’s how you said it.

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Communication is a wonderful thing, it keeps us informed, allows us to share and bond along life’s weary road, and in many ways is under-appreciated. Everything we do, every move we make, every word we speak communicates volumes about us. How often do you take time to think about how you communicate?

There’s verbal and nonverbal communications. There’s written communication, and electronic communication. New forms of communication like Twitter and Facebook and texting have changed the way we communicate. All of these things are great. I’m sure you would agree that these are important. But do you stop and think about how you’re using it?

We’ve all been there. You write an email (or a text, or tweet) and is totally not received in the way it you thought it would. Email (and texts and tweets) can’t duplicate sarcasm or teasing in the way the human voice can. Or you’ve been following someone’s blog and finally get to hear them speak, only to learn that you can’t really connect with them when you hear them speak because their voice sounds so different from the way you imaged.

We all tend to get so busy and focused on what we want to say that we forget to think about who will be hearing the message. In my opinion, this is the most important part. It doesn’t matter how well crafted our message is if your audience isn’t able to understand the message, or interprets it incorrectly. Think about what you want them to hear, understand and remember – not what you want to say. There is power in every word you choose, so choose wisely.

Take a few minutes today and think about how you are communicating. Are you using video the right way? Are you sending emails when I phone call would be faster and save confusion? Are the words or action you’re choosing the right ones for the medium and the audience? A moment listening to your communication may just help you find a better way to say what you have to say.

Remember it’s not always what you say, it’s how you say it that can get you into trouble.

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